5 things I never knew about toilet training


by Emmy

1. Number one is a doozy. When all of my mum friends were sharing how they were toilet training or how their children were ‘toilet trained’ I thought that meant they were toilet trained. As in every wee and every poo successfully landed in the toilet. Upon experience it actually just means they are not wearing nappies and they probably still do have accidents. Ok there are a few children who, once commenced toilet training, never had any accidents (pretty sure this was me; did I mention I was a genius albeit tantrum throwing baby?) but for the vast majority when they say toilet trained/training, it means yes there are accidents, it is a process. It is just that talking about scraping poo from your kids undies isn’t really a latte sipping mama conversation starter. Go figure.

2. Toilet training isn’t genetic. Apparently my own parents toilet trained me in a weekend (as aforementioned, I was a genius). Well I would like to set the record straight that it has been, um, I don’t know – MONTHS now of ‘toilet training’ and I am still scraping poo off undies or if it is really bad tossing said undies. (Sorry to anyone reading this post whilst sipping a latte).

3. It is a myth (well for my child anyway) that they poo at the same time each day. Maybe my son is just super regular but he pretty much poos at a different time every day and usually two to three times a day. Burgh.

4. When your child does an ‘accident’ in public people actually do judge you. And they stare. And they don’t help. Oh it isn’t embarrassing to your child, but it is embarrassing to you.

5. It requires a next-level-out-of-this-world of patience and it doesn’t actually matter how long it takes. They will do it when they are ready. Well that is what I am telling myself every gosh darn day!

Happy Toilet Training! As a complete novice I hope to better my chances second time around, so I would love to know any tips you might have.

Oh and I have don’t have any Instagram / Pinterest worthy photos of all of our failed toilet training attempts (go figure) so here are some cute photos of my babes being one with nature. No oceans were harmed with accidental poops during this photo-shoot. Scouts honour.

Authors Edit: I should mention since I have written this piece Oliver has managed to successfully wee and poo in the toilet on most occasions. BOOM! 

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